Kids' Reaction

I was pretty sure my children would be happy about the news of my pregnancy, but I didn't realize how excited they were going to be.

We decided to tell them at dinner. After a few minutes of chatting about miscellaneous topics, I said, "Dad and I have some news for you." I then said, "You may be having a baby brother or sister in a few months." Khasia said, "Really? Oh, I hope so!". Her reaction made me realize that the way I worded things, it sounded like Dad and I were considering trying to have a baby someday, so I clarified with, "I am pregnant." All four of them were excited and that was the topic for the rest of the meal.

Arriah (14) was very excited, but thought that it would be a bit weird to be 15 and in high school with an infant sibling. "A good weird," she clarified. On Sunday morning, she had told me about her dream that night, of having a baby girl and not knowing how to take care of it. She made the connection at dinner, that maybe she had actually been dreaming about my baby, rather than her having one. She's now pretty sure this baby will be the girl she dreamed about (although she knows it was just a dream and this baby might also be a boy).

Braelen (12) sat there with what looked like a fairly stunned expression for quite a while, although he did express a hope that the baby will be a boy. When I mentioned that the due date was probably mid October, he thought it would be awesome if the baby was born on his birthday (September 29th). I explained that if it is a boy, he'll have to get rid of his queen size bed in order to share his room with the new baby. He's excited about that. Of all our kids, he has always been the most 'into' new babies.

Khasia (9...almost 10) was just excited. She went on and on about how exciting it will be to have a new baby in the family, and wished she could be the one to share a bedroom with "her" (she's insisting it will be a girl). She started making plans for things she'll be able to do with the baby and the fact that she'll be able to babysit "her" in a couple of years. She mostly was just excited and is really hoping for a new sister.

Shaya (7, will be 8 in March) was also excited, but she also started worrying. Her first thought was that she would miss me when I was in the hospital to have the baby. She had quite a few questions, especially later that night after I read her a couple of chapters and started singing to her. She asked if she would still be read and sung to at night, or if she was going to have to fall asleep by herself after the baby is born. I tried to be honest, explaining that we will still read and sing most nights, but there may be nights when we can't. She'll be displaced as the baby of the family, so this may affect her the hardest of the four kids. I'm sure we'll have many conversations about the various aspects, and I will probably have to find some sibling books to help ease her worries. She was, overall, excited about having a new sibling; she just has a few concerns.

We asked the kids to wait for a few weeks to tell anyone. In hindsight, I think that was unfair of us to do. We should have waited to tell them until we were ready to tell everyone else. They're so excited, they want to go tell their friends right away, so we cut it back a bit and told them could tell people on February 1st.

I had to explain that sometimes there are miscarriages, and that at my age, it's a real possibility that I won't carry this baby to term. If I have a miscarriage and we've told everyone, then those people will feel sorry for us and that might make some of them uncomfortable around me for a while. Waiting two weeks probably won't make much of a difference, but we'll see. That was the compromise I made. And I think they kind of understand, although Khasia said, "Don't be surprised if I accidentally blurt it out!"